Saturday, October 9

AQUILA NEWS



In a miraculus turn of events today the office of the High Lords of Terra have declared that their special task force "Scientificus obscurous," has achieved its goal of completing the study of science.

"We had originally set out to discover everything that could be discovered (except those heretical things properly forbidden). I am proud to admit that we have been able to do this by the Emperors holy light (blessed be his name)." This achievement was wrought in a little over 14 hours.
When asked about the new technologies discovered and how it was done so quickly a representative of the task force stated.
"That is the beauty of this discovery. We know that as mankind is the only race which is blessed by the light of the Emperor... As such we know that he has given us everything that is holyand right. We have in fact come with no new discoveries. This does not surprise us, of course, because we knew that we already have been revealed everything that we need to know and all otherknowledge is heretical."
The Holy Inquisition glorified in this (old) news because this then means that any new scientific progress is heretical and of the immaterium. A statement from Inquisitor Evan went as such.
"We are in praise with this recent development, we will now be able to stamp out all scientificprogression... In fact we have already raided three homes where people tried to use science."
The Inquisitor then went on to ban the following items (unless issued by the proper authorities andwith a valid liscense)
1. Bunsen Burners
2. Periodic Table of the Elements
3. Microscopes
4. Telescopes
5. Chalk and Black Boards
6. White Lab Coats
7. Pocket Protectors
8. Beakers
9. Flasks (unless for drinking)
10. Any and all other items deemed 'heretical,' hereafter.
*editorial: We at Aquila news think that this is a wonderful point in humanity because we can nowstop thinking such heretical thoughts such as "how can this be better," or "What will happen if..."We can now all work safe in the knowledge that the Emperors men have discovered all of science and anything beyond that is heresy!
Aquila News

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